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Not giving up !!

Friday, June 26, 2015

I'm back....again lol

I haven't posted anything in months ! Wow, I'm so sorry, I need to keep up with my blog huh ? 

So much has happened in the last 6 months, its crazy. 

The biggest thing that happened, was my beloved grandmother passed away on April 28th. Its been hard to deal with, because she was in good health, and even though she was 95, no one expected this to happen, not even her doctor. My daughter took it the hardest, because she was very close to my grandmother (whom my daughter called Baba, Ukrainian term for grandmother), and she was accustomed to seeing her every day since she was born (and my daughter turns 5 next week, so that's a long time in the life of a child). For weeks, she kept waking up crying for Baba, and the worst came about 2 weeks ago, when I asked her what she wants for her birthday, she looked at me with a sad look on her face, and proceeded to tell me "mommy, all I want for my birthday is for Baba to come home from heaven, I don't want her in heaven anymore." Dam near broke my heart with that one statement. 

It still hurts, and I have my days where I cry and miss her so, as well as days where I'm okay, can even reminisce about memories with granny. The thing that hurts me most, which makes me feel like a horrible granddaughter, is that I can't remember what her voice sounds like. I wish now that I had gotten her on video instead of only taking pictures of her. What I wouldn't do to hear her voice again.

(below is a pic of granny when she was about 17 years old (the black and white pic), and the other pic was taken in january of this year)

Another big thing that happened, I got my daughter registered for kindergarten ! She is so excited to start school September 1st. Its so hard to believe my babygirl is turning 5 and starting school already. Its going to be a big adjustment for both of us, because we are so used to being with each other every day. I never put her in daycare because I figured why spend money to put her in daycare if I'm home all day anyhow. Even though I know the space will do us both some good, its gonna feel weird being home all day without my lil diva. The house will be too quiet lol. 

I think that's pretty much all the "new" things happening in my life right now that's worth talking about. 

I know I haven't been very current with my posts, and I do apologize. But that will change. I have downloaded the blogger app on to my ipad mini, so now I have no excuse lol. I will try my best to post at least once a week. 

Talk to you guys soon